I wanna play

Seeing as how I'm always last picked for kickball and memes, here's mine:

WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I was almost named for my Uncle Carlo.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I have a signature like a rock star. That's all I need.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Bologna on white bread with Miracle Whip and a dab of French's mustard. This is lunch when I mow the yard. The beer and bag of Fritos are just window dressing at that point.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Not yet...and not from a lack of trying. Definitely enjoy the trying part.

IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? How can you not love my cute and cuddly face?

DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Does a brown bear shit in the woods?

DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? The only things willingly removed from my body are my wisdom teeth.

WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Push a fat Texican over a bridge with a rubber band tied to his feet? ARE YOU CRACKED OR WHAT?!

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Dude, Frosted Flakes. 'Nuff said.

DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Hello, McFly? Texan here. No such thing as laces on boots. Unless you count lace up ropers.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? I've got chisled abs of steel. No! Wait! Don't laugh so hard. What's so funny? I was cracking a joke. Remember, sarcasm? Seriously, I can ride a bicycle all day long in the hot August sun and not think twice. I've been known to carry my own body weight up and down the Texas Hill Country. I once carried a 150# deer carcass three miles to camp. Answer your question?

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Ben & Jerry have yet to invented a flavor I don't like.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Body language. Tells a lot about how we are going to interact.

RED OR PINK? It's all pink on the inside.

WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? Lack of attention to detail. Procrastination. My big fat beer gut.

WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Pinky and the Brain

WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? OD Green cargo shorts and sans shoes at this time.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? #2 with Bacon, Cheese and Jalapenos with fries and a Coke from Whataburger.



FAVORITE SMELLS? Sweden in the Summer. Gulf of Mexico. Aroma of a fine cigar or pipe tobacco. A bottle of bourbon just opened. Hoppe's No. 9. A real hardware store (not one of the big box stores). Fresh cut grass. Summer rain storm in the mountains of Colorado.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Some customer irritating the crap outta me.

FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Baseball at the stadium, and Lacrosse on T.V.

HAIR COLOR[S]? Brown turning grey.


DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? I'm too sexy for contacts or glasses.

FAVORITE FOOD? Lasagna, chicken fried steak, venison tamales, PB&J at 12a.m....the list goes on.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary has to be a mind fuck, not some slasher flick. I'll take the occasional happy ending, too.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Lord of War with Nicolas Cage (iPod), Pirates of the Caribbean (theater)


SUMMER OR WINTER? Any season anwhere but Texas. We only have summer and five minutes of winter.

HUGS OR KISSES? Do I get to pick?

FAVORITE DESSERT? Apple Pie with vanilla ice cream

MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? I'm the last person in the blogosphere to do this...so, me.

LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Sheila Jackson Lee. She won't return dad's phone calls, either.

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Just finished The Weapon by Michael Z. Williamson and starting on Son of the Circus by John Irving.

WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Shiner Kolsch beer.

WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? I was downloading songs on the computer all night.

FAVORITE SOUND[S]? Distant thunder. Train whistle in the distance. A baby's laugh. The sounds associated with a tactical reload.

ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Stones. How much for Keith's ashes and a rolled up $20?

WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Katrineholm Sweden to the east. Kodiak, Alaska to the west. Milwaukee, Wisconsin to the north. Grand Cayman to the south.

DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Some women used to say I knew my alphabet, and still others claimed I knew calligraphy.

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Houston, Texas.


HollyB said...

A NATIVE Houstonian? DAHM! You, my Mother, G'mother, and GBro are the only NATIVE Houstonians I know/have known!

Ambulance Driver said...

"DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Some women used to say I knew my alphabet, and still others claimed I knew calligraphy."

ROFLMAO...you're the first person I've encountered besides me that used that line. Me, I've mastered thirteen fonts and am working on my calligraphy as well.

AlanDP said...

I also like the smell of old-fashioned feed stores.

HollyB said...

You WHINER! You were NOT picked last...I tagged you on this the day I posted it, almost a week ago. WANKER ;)

shooter said...

Weeelllll excuuuuusee me! I guess I missed the invite lil' miss holly wonderbritches. ;)

I'm just a simple caveman. Your newfangled computer blogs and memes confuse and scare me.

/Phil Hartman rant off/

CrankyProf said...

Why has it always got to be the brown bears shitting in the woods, you discriminator? What about the black bears, the spectacled bears, and the panda bears -- or the koala bears?

THEY all have to poop somewhere.

You're just hatin' on the bear diversity!

shooter said...

Well, I could have used, "Does the Pope shit in the Vatican?" But then, where does the rabbi go? What about the Dali Lama? Zoroastrans? Tom Cruise?

I'm an equal opportunity hater. I just haven't found enough time to hate everything and everyone. So many bears, so little ammunition.

HollyB said...

LMAO, Shooter. I'll tease you more gently next time. I figured a Native Houstonian could take it. Was it the "wanker" that pushed your button?